How To Email A Therapist For The First Time: Step-By-Step

This isn a drawing of a person email a therapist from their phone

How to email a therapist for the first time

How to get a therapist

This is a simple step-by-step guide that will only take you 5 minutes to write in a new email. The most important thing to understand when finding a therapy appointment is that often they will be too busy to see you. Do not give up if the first email doesn’t get you an appointment with a therapist or counselor. Keep trying!

Here is How To Email A Therapist For The First Time: Step-By-Step.

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Realizing that your mental health will benefit from talking to a professional like a therapist or a counsellor is a huge hurdle to overcome. However, this is just the beginning of a road of unknowns like, how often should you go to therapy once you find the right therapist.

For those struggling with anxiety, depression, stress or any other mental health situation, dealing with unknown areas can be extremely hard to complete. 

As you have realized, the seemingly simple task of emailing a potential therapist for the first time is daunting. So, I am here to make this step as easy as possible.

Let me take you through all the steps needed to email a therapist for the first time with the least amount of anxiety & stress possible because therapy is worth it.

Another option for finding a therapist to work with is to use an online therapy app. The beauty of using an app is that it will always have a therapist ready for you, and you can find more available times to have your therapy sessions.

Try Calmerry, BetterHelp or today and save yourself the back and forth-of initial emails and scheduling headaches that comes with in-person therapy.

Explore our favorite online therapy apps


BetterHelp is an online counseling platform connecting individuals with licensed therapists for convenient mental health support.
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An online therapy platform offering access to professional therapists for personalized and confidential mental health services from the comfort of home.
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Evidence-based therapy support through interactive worksheets, live sessions, and messaging with professionals.
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How To Email A Therapist For The First Time

When reaching out to a therapist for the first time, it is best to keep it short. Introduce yourself, give a brief sentence on why you are reaching out and then ask if they have time to see you in the next few days.

Be sure to give a seven-day maximum window of when you want to see them. If the therapist is swamped and can only see you a month from now, this will not help you.

1. Greeting

Start your email as you would any email. Politeness gets you much farther than demanding anyone’s help. I like to keep my emails more personal, sometimes adding emojis to the introduction. And to be helpful to them, let them know where you found them. 

Greeting ideas

  • Hi Susan, my name is Meghan. I found you online. You were one of the top 3 in my area.
  • Hey Mark, I’m Paul. Thanks for taking to time to read this. I hope you can help me. 
  • Gary, my name is Steve, I see you have a lot of five-star reviews. I hope you’re available to help me.

2. Straight to the point looking for help

It is better to save unloading your entire life story on why you want to see a therapist. I only say this because It may take reaching out to 5 or 10 different therapists before you find the one available to see you. 

After the initial greeting, give a 1-2 sentence explanation of why you seek help. The descriptive sentences will help provide the therapist with some context on where you are at in life. 

Straight to the point looking for help ideas

  • I have been dealing with anxiety in my life ever since I can remember and want to feel normal.
  • My dad passed away last summer, and I can’t stop crying whenever I think of him. Can you help?
  • My work has been stressful ever since I got promoted. I don’t know if I made the wrong choice taking it.

3. Ask for availability 

Now that you have introduced yourself and explained an overall picture of your mental health struggles, it’s time to ask them when they have availability in their calendar. Be specific if your work only allows you to have particular day hours open.

Also, please give them a time window to make this first interaction. The longer you wait to see them for the first time, you might start entirely talking yourself out of the idea. 

Availability ideas

  • I work 9-5 from Monday through Friday. Do you have any spots open after 6 pm this upcoming week?
  • I have worked from home ever since the pandemic changed things. Do you do zoom sessions? If so, I can do it any time of the day.
  • I am a nurse and do shirt work. Because of this, I have 3-4 day chunks when I can come in anytime. Might this work?

4. Phone / Zoom consultation

Something not discussed often is that you can ask for a 15-minute phone or video call consultation for no charge. During the consultation, you can get a better feeling of who your potential therapist is as a person to see if you connect. The call will also let you dive more into what you are seeking from them and answer any questions they may have. 

Much progress in therapy comes from the compatibility a therapist and client have. But do not worry too much about this or let it hold you back if you are unsure. Therapy is like any other profession, rarely do people stay with one person for their entire life. 

Read this article to help if you ever want to find a new therapist: How to break up with your therapist.

5. Ask about price per session

Now that you have given them all the essential information they need to move forward with you, it’s time for you to ask something of them. Now you can ask how much the cost is per single session. I would also ask if there is a reduced-priced for a package of 10 or more therapy sessions

Cost-reducing ways to do therapy also come in the forms of sliding scale Therapy. Also online Therapy platforms like Talkspace, BetterHelp and Online-Therapy can be more cost-effective.

Read the article how often should you go to therapy before you start adding up the potential cost of your therapy sessions per month.

6. Ask for a referral 

Finally, all of the needed information is for you and your potential therapist. 

However, this does not mean they have time to see you. Their client workload might be full for months. So end the email with the simple task of passing you along to a colleague if they can’t see you. 

They may forward your email or reply with a few names and email addresses you can reach them. Doing this will save you a lot of time and stress repeating this process and trying to find more therapists to contact. 

What Do You Say To Your Therapist For The First Time?

Once you have found a therapist, a whole new journey awaits you with a ton of first, which can be daunting each step. Here are a few essential areas that will help you feel confident before your first session.

1. What to talk about in therapy

Knowing what to talk about in therapy will help start any conversation with a therapist. It is not uncommon to be sitting in your therapy session and finding yourself at a loss for words.

2. Things to work on in therapy

Not everything you work on in therapy needs to come from a negative experience. Telling your therapist about the wins you have had most recently can be a major benefit to your and your mental health goals.

3. How to get the most out of therapy

Finding mental peace starts with seeking a professional therapist, but there is so much more you can and should do. Start by understanding how to get the most out of therapy and then allow that to trickle into the rest of your day.

4. How to tell your parents you need therapy

No matter how old you are, it can be hard to admit to people that you are seeing a therapist. And on the other spectrum, being a teenager seeking help for your mental health can be even more stressful, as you will want to know how to tell your parents you feel the need to see a therapist.


In your first email to a therapist, start by telling them why you are contacting them. Then finish the email by asking them what the cost of sessions is and their availability.

When meeting your therapist for the first time, be sure to say what is on your mind. That can be why you are there, your fear of therapy or anything else. The only wrong thing to say is to tell them lies.

Start the message with your therapist by saying why you are reaching out to them. You can also ask them how much they charge and their availability.

Being honest is the best way to introduce yourself to a new therapist. Say what’s on your mind at that moment. A few suggestions of topics are to talk about your past, your mental struggles, or what you want to get out of therapy.

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